Be thankful

Sometimes its hard to see that.  Even going through the most horrible year of my life...by far...I have soo much to be thankful for.  Even though Ava and Teagan aren't here with us I am thankful that I carried them in my belly for 34 weeks.  I'm thankful for every single kick, punch, nudge they ever gave me.  I'm thankful God chose us to be their mommy and daddy.  I'm thankful for every single ultrasound we had that gave me so much time to see them and watch them growing inside me.  For all the pictures and videos of them in there.  I'm thankful for the 2 days they were here with us, for getting to touch them and kiss them, watch them move around and open their eyes to look at us. Im very thankful for the time that I held them in my arms. I'm thankful for every single thing that has to do with them.  That is only the beginning.  Even though they are not here and I miss them everyday and some days I have a hard time seeing or feeling anything good I am so blessed.  I'm thankful for my amazing husband.  For my 2 beautiful, perfect healthy children B and B!  I have an amazing family and group of close friends that I don't know what Id do without that I am so thankful for.  I'm thankful for a roof over our heads, food on our table and clothes on our backs.  I'm really thankful for my health, even though its been a rough year its all things that will heal but I'm alive and breathing and I'm sooo thankful for that!  Just always remember that even in the absolute lowest of times in your life there is ALWAYS something to be thankful for!  

My husband

I love him!  Sooo much!!


I am one lucky girl.

I honestly don't know what I would do with out him.  I know that I am so lucky to have a husband like Jason.  He is sweet, caring, funny, thoughtful, fun... the list goes on :)  He doesn't talk a lot about his own feelings but listens to anything and everything I say.  He always makes sure that I am ok.  He makes sure to always tell me several times a day that he loves and misses me.   He always asks what he can do to make me feel better even though he knows there really isn't anything anyone can do when I am having a bad day.  He is the one person that I know will always be there for me no matter what.  He is here by my side when I'm at my lowest and will be here with me always.  He is one person I know will not get mad at me for the way I feel or act.  He is the one person that knows exactly what I'm going through and would never judge me for it or tell me to do it differently.  He is just always there no matter what.  Many people go through hard time or tragedies and it will tear them down or sometimes tear them completely apart.  For us it hasn't done that at all.  It has brought us so much closer.  I have always loved Jason so much but I love him sooo much more and feel so much closer to him.  He is an amazing father.  B and B are so lucky to have him and Ava and Teagan were so lucky God chose him to be their Daddy.  He has so much love for our sweet babies.  He is so strong for me even when grieving himself for the loss of his daughters.  I thank God every single day for Jason.  I thank him that I have him, that B and B have him and that Ava and Teagan have him.  He loves his children, all 4, so much.